vacuum_packed_people-get-ripped-fitness-craze-bikini-body-beach-body-marketing, self confidence, self esteem, body image, sausages_4

Ripped For The Summer? Vacuum Packed People, Why?

Did I miss something? Is there a secret trend going on that I don't know about? First of all, my social feeds recently keep telling me to 'Get Ripped'. Then there are companies trying to sell me pills to help me get ripped, ouch, which sounds like something somewhere between getting mugged and destroying your best trousers. Sounds unpleasant. At best. The ads are persistent too. In fact, that seems to be part of their sales pitch. Because of their omnipresence, I do find myself taking the time to assess whether or not I really need a pill to help me look robbed and scruffy. It doesn't take long to come to a decision and usually I just scroll on by.

But What Does Getting Ripped Really Mean?

First, let's take a look at the pictures - What's happening there? Perfectly normal people, albeit somewhat intense in the face department, with bizarro muscle formations wearing very little clothes. Oh, hang on, I was way off. Essentially getting 'ripped' means being vacuum packed into your own skin. That's the trend ladies and gentleman - looking like a pack of sausages. How odd. Kids these days, right?

vacuum_packed_people-get-ripped-fitness-craze-bikini-body-beach-body-marketing, self confidence, self esteem, body image, sausages_4
Get the look!

More Sausage Bashing?

Now don't get me wrong, I like sausages. A lot. This isn't another one of sausage bashing blog posts that are so popular these days. But wouldn't you agree that there's a time and place for everything? In brief, vacuum packed sausages should be in your fridge ready for the BBQ. Human beings can then stand around, not in your fridge, looking normal. Is that weird?

Difficult to digest, I know.

And like I said, for the most part, they're persistent. It's like they read somewhere if you repeat something enough times people will then start to believe it's true...

- Advertisement: 'Get ripped for the summer'

- Me: That looks weird

- Advertisement: 'Get ripped for the summer'

- Me: that looks weird

- Advertisement: 'Get ripped for the summer'

- Me: that looks weird

- Advertisement: 'Get ripped for the summer'

- Me: I WANT TO LOOK LIKE SAUSAGES!

 

Women's Intuition & Getting Ripped

Now, seeing as I've never met one of these vacuum packed people in real life, I have to ask... Do they really exist? If so, what monster did this to them? And finally, will somebody please think of the children? It may be my sixth sense here, woman's intuition, but I think those ads are actually trying to position the sausage ripped people as attractive… 

 

Very Odd Sales Pitch...

"Hey you, yes you, normal looking person over there.  You look too normal-ish. Come give us all your money and take this supplement that's sure to destroy your innards and we'll make you look like all the air was sucked out of you until your skin clings to your muscles in a horrifying kind of way. It'll be a laugh".

It's like Body Worlds - the exhibition of dead bodies, where the artists / scientists remove the skin and put the bodies in lifelike poses. Except in this case, the dead bodies are alive - and they want all your money so you too can become an alive-dead-body-ripped-sausage-monster.

I am so out of touch. Is it just me who doesn't get this trend?

Every Cloud Has A...

Well, at least the vacuum packed people have one thing going for them - they're uncommonly strong. so, next time they're standing too close to the BBQ and someone mistakes them for a packet of sausages, they can almost definitely wrestle their way out of a fiery death.

Silver linings, right?

No Comments

Post A Comment